Day 193/365

when i was a kid i was told (ALL the time) i was bullheaded - stubborn even... these days i prefer determined. when i was a kid i fell asleep with hamburger in my mouth. the story goes i was force fed a bit of my dinner. they could make me take a bite, but they couldn't get me to swallow it... i was two. for whatever reason, any time i was told "you can't" this only fueled my determination. words of encouragement. if i ever uttered "i can't" my dad would tell me "can't never could". true that! i was raised by a man that wanted sons... so the best compliment given was "not bad for a GIRL". that was always said with an endearing smile. he told me regularly, i was lucky i was born a girl... (because he probably would have killed me otherwise lol). my dad would often ask my older sister "why does she have to be like that?". my sister would say "she gets that from YOU". lol i laugh when i think about this, and cry because i miss him. i'm a fighter, i always have been. always up for the challenge at hand. its funny because it has never felt like a choice, its always just worked out that way. getting older i see the wisdom of my parents, the many lessons they tried to teach me... i had to pick my own path, walk the walk, fight the battles and win the wars on my own terms. i have eight more days until my 30's are behind me, a distant memory... to be honest i'm glad of that because my 30's have mostly sucked. it freaks me out to think i'll be forty, and honestly even typing that caused me to have heart palpitations! these last few years i have worked through a lot of my issues, gaining a level of peace and acceptance. i'm pretty sure i am ready for the next phase... i guess it doesn't really matter how ready i am, its gonna happen anyway. 

ILLUMINATE

Illuminate vb 1: To supply or brighten with light: light up  2: To make clear: to bring to the fore  3: To decorate with designs or pictures in gold or colors

this is the word prompt for Sunday Creative [August 20- September 4]

this song plays in my head...